SC2Mapster

I am going to make this brief and useful:

1. First dice up your game play before getting onto cinematics and sound. Cinematics are quite complex and I don't think you are up to that standard yet (sorry :/) as there are lots of cinematic bugs

2. For your first map, don't make it big and make it designed for a RPG map, I think if you are going to make a campaign series, always remember Game Play < Terrain.
E.G A Campaign that I think to good for you to learn from.

3. There is only four short mission objectives and the third doesn't update, so I just went for the scientist and brought him back and won :/. Update the mission objectives before releasing the map, otherwise people will go insane, having to remember the objective 24/7.

4. This map needs serious improvements, if I am going to recommend it to people. This map is lacking and needs improvement. Follow my tip, start off small - finish big, this is a jump to the shark map and I recommend you to fix this map up.

5. You noted that you know about those mistakes, here is the immortal tip NEVER release a map when it still have bugs, this is the most important tip, if you are going to release the map in 3/4 production, the map is not going to be that good, fix it up and then dice it a bit before releasing your map. Keep testing your map until it is good for release.

6. On a final note, this map needs serious improvement, I recommend you to fix up the mistakes and polish the map before releasing another map, if you are lazy, hold back the release date for a few days, SC2mapster is not urging you to publish map at crazy speed.

Hope this helps, this is meant to be constructive and help you improve.

P.S - Seems like I can't keep it brief (Sighs)

New single player campaign, nice :)

I agree with well.. everything that Tyneara writed. First ten minutes is just walking and shooting rocks.

Long dialogs without sound are boring. In Blizzard maps where you have sound long dialogs are nice but without sound those just don't work.

PS. I played your map yesterday but commented today when I noticed that you commented my campaign. If you want to use anything from my maps (such as triggers) I'm just happy if you learn anything from those.

As for cinematic mode, the best advice I can give is to think like a movie and how the camera moves in a movie, then try and replicate it in game. While you won't be able to get good close ups (due to being unable to truly use the storymode assets) think about the basics of cinematography and how the camera rarely stays fixed at a single point.

Try to show, instead of tell what's going on.

I realize this is a really abstract description of cinematography. Hopefully its helpful. Keep working at it. Unfortunately, it takes drastically longer to create than it does to play these maps. (trust me, I'm still trying to get mine perfected)

Okay, so I gave it ago. Here's the good and the bad.

Good
-Terrain was very nicely done, well setup, and very believable for a mining colony. Its honestly the highlight of the entire setup.

The Not so Good (aka, the bad)
-Overall the map is boring. You spend probably 10 minutes or so just wandering around shootings rocks. There's no odd-ball zerg attacks, or really even any tension builders. Its not because of your terrain, but because it doesn't do anything worth noting.
-Mid Game transmission with the SCV is painfully long with zero camera movement, very boring from an audience standpoint. Try to keep the dialogue concise. (remember, we're here to play starcraft not watch a movie)
-Lots of grammar errors, but I'll assume English isn't you native language. At times it was almost impossible to understand what you were saying though.
-Final Command Center zerg attack wipes the floor with my dudes. The siege tank also doesn't change to my ownership nor can I build any turrets as suggested by the SCV. Its possible I could've won had I not been caught more or less off guard, but it was dicey if you ask me.
-The camera is frequently moved to focus on something, but you don't drop to cinematic mode to do it. This is incredibly jarring from a gameplay standpoint. My personal thoughts on it are to always use a fadeout, followed by a move and a cinematic of some sort (which can be short) or simply add a marker to draw the players attention.

I did not encounter a param/value error.

Overall I believe your story has merit, if you can clean up your grammar it'll be easier to understand. Furthermore, trying to breath a bit more life into your game world can't hurt. This being a non base building map means that you map itself needs to keep the player interested as they progress.